Giving Up on a “New Me”

What if, instead of yearning to be someone new, we dedicate ourselves to becoming fully ourselves?

What if instead, we change our relationship to ourselves?

What if we change

the way we see ourselves

speak to ourselves

what we ask of ourselves

how we relate to our thoughts and feelings

What happens then?

Then … we turn toward creating a deep sense of self-knowing – what matters, what we aspire to, how we show up for ourselves, how we relate to the others in our worlds.  Being able to see imperfections as part of our growth and learning.  Allowing ourselves to experience challenge and take risks because we are no longer so afraid to fail.  Being able to accept and express a full range of emotions.  Being able to recognise and tend to what is needed.

What would then drop away? 

We start to soften and let go. Of the “never enough”. The shame. The putting everyone else’s needs first. Of prioritising “nice” over brave and true. Of the suppressing difficult thoughts and feelings. Of the need for coping strategies like over-eating and other numbing and avoidance strategies. Of the avoidance of challenge and growth because the pain of failure along the way is too difficult. Of the resentment within relationships when surfacing friction and establishing boundaries feels too difficult.

This re-frame is huge.  It’s what I am learning and applying to myself and with my clients within my coaching practice and retreat work.  To offer a space, with a compassionate presence, wide toolbox, and playful sense of experimentation, where people can come home to themselves, drop the struggle, and gain the freedom to be themselves, learn grow and thrive.